Not Sure…

I’m not really sure how to do this second post back. I have a lot going on right now and I’m not sure which direction is best for me on this gloomy, achy-sore, kicking-the-habit-groggy-funk day. I think I’ll do a list to see if I can cover many of my bases since there’s too much happening in my life, too much to catch up on. I know many of you have asked me about the boys and the crazy neighbor situation we had…but there’s a lot of new things on top of the whole “I’m back up on my horse” thing. So…here goes nothing.

1.) Day three of this healthy eating stuff is rearing its ugly head. My body is kicking like a person detoxing from drugs (or so I guess from what the movies show me – LOL). I’m sore and I have a headache that just won’t quit, but it’s my TOM and my guts are bucking. Sorry if that’s TMI. I’m doing VERY well here though. Every morsel has been logged into my BodyMedia account. I did three miles yesterday and it was tougher than the first day’s two miles (plus a bike ride!), too for whatever reason, but I tackled it no matter what. I haven’t binged either and my husband is beyond supportive..even allowing me to bow out of a social gathering I was supposed to attend tonight at a Mexican restaurant. I know I can’t trust myself with those chips in front of me in the initial get-back-up-and-go phase of this and there is absolutely nothing healthy on that menu. Soooo…things are going well on the health front. I’m on Instagram if you want to see what I’m up to when I’m not sitting in front of the computer blogging. I’m trying to get all my food/activity in there in pics. Give me about a week to get back into that routine 100%. 

2.) The boys are great. They’re growing like weeds. I can’t stand it. I want to freeze them as they are now. Coco is still my pony-loving snuggle bug. Jude is still my bookworm. His birthday is coming up soon and we’re celebrating by doing “The Color Run” in Philadelphia again. We’re hitting up the pool all summer long, too. We all own bikes now and are waiting for our car hitch to arrive so we can travel and bike. There have been some awesome adventures for us lately, too, including a 36 hour car ride to and from Georgia to spend time with my sister. Oh, so many things we’ve seen and done in the wake of my dad’s passing…in an attempt to “live.” The boys have been having a blast.

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3.) Our crazy neighbor “Puff” (the one we suspect put sugar in Tillie…our Pontiac) moved out before October 1, 2013. We occasionally see her driving around town, smoking in the car with her children…one who got and beat cancer (remember the chemo kit you guys helped me prepare of that poor boy? Well, he lost his leg due to the cancer, but he’s doing much better now…which is the good news…the bad news is: his mother sucks). We now have a new set of neighbors upstairs…about 10-12 of them crammed into a three-bedroom apartment who like their Mexican music loud and prefer to dump their cigarettes into the dry mulch under our living room windows, but they’re not as bad as the nut-job we had before…so we’ll take it. We’ve also had A LOT of SWAT activity and meth lab stuff happening here these passed few months. It’s been fun having to hunker down on the bedroom floor with the kids while we hear explosions of flash bombs going off…OH! Then there was the ricin incident we had…yea…Google it…it made national news. Last night, while outside after dinner with the kids, we are pretty sure we saw two heroin addicts walk into the building to buy drugs. Oh, and we have an arsonist on our street who recently set fire to the house behind our bedroom window. Yay! This place….this place…..

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4.) Here’s some great news to follow up that apartment-life update: we’re moving out in August! We will have a townhouse about 20 minutes from us in a better, nicer town with a MUCH lower crime rate (we’re WAY too close to Philadelphia here). The place has three-bedrooms, a huge park right out the front door, great trails and a better school district. The neighbors there are all around our age, with kids…none of them smoke or do drugs. The countdown begins and the four of us are BEYOND excited and antsy to get the heck out of this apartment complex that is virtually turning into its own level of Hell. (below is a pic of our new living room…I’m painting it a nice, neutral gray, don’t worry, I’ll drive you guys nuts with tales of renovations and the projects I’m doing for it.)

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5.) Speaking of last night, I learned that my biological mother died. How do I feel about all this? I don’t know. I’m completely numb…er…apathetic. I’m not relieved…I thought I would be relieved…like, “She finally got what she deserved,” but I don’t feel like that. I’m not sad either. I just feel…neutral. I don’t expect anything from her death either. She won’t have written me a letter explaining what she did to us when we were kids. There will never be an apology either. So…I feel “meh” about it all. I’ll let you guys know if things change. Please don’t feel the need to write any “I’m sorry for your loss” comments either. She was an awful human being and an even worse mother from what I can remember before she abandoned us. I’m happy my children never got to know her. 

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I think that’s enough for one day. I have to now get up and moving because I feel like a sloth. My headache has subsided a bit and my exercise won’t complete itself. Here’s to a continuance of better, healthier days. Up and at ’em, guys and dolls! UP AND AT ‘EM! 

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7 thoughts on “Not Sure…

  1. Your new place is exciting! so glad y’all found a safe place for all of you to live! =) Keep on rockin’ it girl. Hang in there and do not ever give up.

  2. Glad you’re getting out of that bad neighborhood! & maybe THIS summer we’ll get back into the neighborhood of Tyler State Park so Coco can get a REAL pony ride 😉

  3. Thanks for catching us up on all the goings-on. I missed hearing how the boys were doing. So glad that you are moving! Also, thrilled that you are back to making healthy decisions for yourself. Welcome back!

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